April 6, 2020
It's been a whirlwind of a few weeks. Many of us are just now catching our breath to assess the situation. At WeddingChaplain.com, we've had to cancel or reschedule about a dozen weddings, and we know we're not alone in this. Scrolling through message boards and social media, it's clear that the entire wedding community is in the same boat, navigating these unprecedented disruptions.
There are new realities. Some couples are cancelling. Some people are rescheduling. Some are rescheduling, but some are wondering if the original plan of 150 people will shrink to 70 or 80, regardless of when you have it, which would affect prices, menus, deposits, and more. From those who you wished would be there, some will simply send wishes and cards for the rest of the season, regardless of when it happens.
First and foremost, here are some of my immediate thoughts.
-Work with your venue first. That is the most significant piece of your plan or preplanning. Start with the venue and work your way down the line. While every vendor, including myself, considers themselves crucial, I recognize the line of priority. The venue and its availability are top priority.
-Call your other vendors as soon as you have a new date or possibilities. If you are a bride, it feels like you are doing this all over again. I know, it stinks. It's not just about the logistics; it's about the emotional toll of having to change your plans. But the good news is, you just did this a few months ago, so you know what to do in this new round of calls.
-You are not alone. Every vendor is going through this, so we are ready for the scramble. On our end, we are trying to be creative and figure things out as well. Everyone is thinking about your problem, trust me. The wedding industry is incredibly adaptable. We've seen it weather many storms, and we will get through this one, too. Your dream wedding may look a little different, but it will still be beautiful and meaningful.
-Maybe Elope. There was a time in this country when elopement was very popular. At some point in your engagement process (not in the last month, hopefully), you threw your hands up and said, “Why didn’t we just elope?” Well, why don’t you?
-Consider splitting up the event. Have the ceremony now with fewer than 10 people and plan a big party later. On the 3rd weekend of March, I did two of these ceremonies. One on Saturday, the other on Sunday. Each ceremony had just the couple and their immediate families, each with fewer than 10 people. While I love the big ceremony and the big party, there was something uniquely beautiful about the intimate ceremony, a moment of pure connection and love.
-Small now, big later. Along those same lines, one of the couples I performed the ceremony for is planning on having a larger ceremony in the summer. Consider this. Do the small one on your date and go bigger later. Note that this varies by different states. Some states are limiting events to 10 people or fewer, while some communities are under a stricter stay-at-home situation.
- Just do the legal stuff now. If the date is important or you already have your license in hand, we can arrange for the officiant and the couple to sign your license and proceed with the ceremony. Our officiants are here to support you and your unique situation, offering flexibility and understanding.
-Get Creative. Yes, the spring wedding in the big venue is poof… So go off the grid. I have seen dozens of couples who held their ceremonies in the middle of the street, and people stayed in their cars. Do something like that. I get it, it's not your vision, but it will undoubtedly be a remarkable story 20 years from now. These unique and creative ideas can make your wedding even more memorable and special.
-Consider a Thursday, Sunday, or Monday. The scenario our group is dealing with is this: a couple is scheduled in April and wants to move their date. They begin looking at the Fall and realize that all the Fridays and Saturdays in September and October are already taken. Then we are considering a whole year of delay. Pick another day. Trust me, if you propose a Thursday wedding to your venue and vendors, they will welcome you with open arms. If your invite list is going to shrink anyway, do a quick survey of Family and Friends to see if a Thursday (or a Sunday or Monday) in September or October would work.
As a group of officiants, we are here to work with you, addressing whatever your needs may be. We understand the challenges you're facing and are ready to assist you in any way we can. If you are not currently one of our clients and one of these suggestions sounds appealing, please let us know, and we'll work out the details.
God Bless and Wash Your Hands!!
Main Image: Photo by cottonbro studio
Thumbnail Image: Photo by cottonbro studio